Sunday, June 10, 2012

Hard things are put in our way, not to stop us, but to call out our courage and strength.

Courage and Strength, along with Faith, Hope and Love are needed.  I reach down to the bottom of my soul and ask that all may be given to us. 
About a month ago, Cindy started noticing a few things that were not quite right with her body.  Every so often bright lights would flash in front of her eyes, then, slowly her left foot began to bother her. It was just a bit at first.  She wasn't able to keep her flip-flops on, and soon she was unable to curl her toes.  Her left hand would shake occasionally and her speech would slur, but so slightly that Cindy was the only one who noticed.
It was probably just a pinched nerve!  Right!?  That’s what we hoped but logic told us it was something more.  A good friend and neighbor arranged to have the first of many tests run, and ruled out the “pinched” nerve.  Suspecting much more he ordered a CT scan and quietly placed a call to Cindy's Oncologist.  That scan revealed horror. 

A number of lesions were found in her brain.  One is attached to the optical nerve, causing the flashing lights, another is affecting her motor skills in her foot and hand.  There is another which could trigger seizures, although she's had none, but it has prohibited her from being able to drive. The lesions are numerous and significant in size.  The next day a full body scan revealed a tumor in her right lung as well as on the lymph nodes behind.  
The breast cancer, which she fought so valiantly to defeat, has reared its ugly head and spread.
I cannot describe the sorrow that hovers over us.  The cancer is inoperable.  It is incurable.  But the Good Lord has not abandoned us, because it is treatable and there is hope for some time to be granted. 
The first treatment plan will be radiation to her brain.  For nearly three weeks radioactive waves will be directed to the lesions in her brain.  The goal is to shrink those lesions.  They will not go away but it is possible for them to be reduced, for a time, minimizing the impact they have on her body. 

A Radiofrequency Ablation or RFA will be performed on the lesion in her lung.  This is where a beam of radiation is used instead of surgery in order to remove a tumor.  Basically the tumor is heated up enough to burn the cancer cells and destroy them.  This type of treatment works well on lung tumors. The alternative, besides surgery would also include chemotherapy.  But chemotherapy cannot be started until the radiation process is complete.  That delay could allow this already large tumor to continue to grow and inhibit the ability to breath freely, so RFA is a good thing. As with any medical procedure there are risks, but it seems that the benefit will out weigh the risk in this case.
Once radiation is complete then a regimen of chemotherapy using a pill called Xeldoa will begin.  This form of chemotherapy will give Cindy mobility instead of being tethered to an intravenous dosage.  There is much she wants to accomplish and the mobility factor is welcomed.
There is so much more involved, but for now I will keep it simple.  I personally believe in miracles and am praying for one.  More specifically I am praying that the radiation treatments will be effective.  That the lesions will shrink and become “quiet”.  That the side effects will be minimal.  I pray that Cindy and Reed, as well as Jason, Erica, Stella, Anton, Deven, Ali, Jordan, Chloe, and Meg will be granted Courage and Strength.  Please add your prayers, faith, hope and love.

Posted by Libby Hansen


  1. praying for the gift of time...and lots of it.

    and for spirits to be lifted, effective treatments, and to be mindful of blessing that may come from this tremendous sorrow.

    and for mom's comfort through it all.

    what a woman, that cindy! resilient, smart, faithful, nurturing. we couldn't ask for a better mother (mother-in-law) or grandmother.

    1. Well said dear Erica...nor could we ask for a better sister or friend!!

  2. I am praying for that perfect clinical trial. I will help you find one any way I am able. I second Erica. Well said. All of your family and friends will be praying for the gift of time. Love you, Susan

  3. I also believe n miracles and you are probably the most eligible candidate for them. We are saying our prayers for you. We love you

  4. I've got to know Cindy more since she became our Relief Society president. She is such a sweet and amazing lady whom you will like and love instinctly. She has a golden heart, loving, caring, giving, trying her best to help anybody! She is a great example in many many ways! I truly admire her and love her. She is having trails now, but I know she will be surrounded by all of us who love her dearly and deeply and will support her by all means. Cindy, love you! You know you are not alone. I will pray for you and add me to the team who fight the battle together with you! Victoria Wang

  5. You have blessed so many lives and its our turn to pray, fast and have faith in a miracle. We will do anything for you Cindy. You're an angel among humans and we love you so much. Please know we'll pray for you and your family and drs.

  6. Love you so much Cindy! Thinking of you and praying for you. Hugs from all of us. You are an amazing friend and example and we love you dearly! SueAnn, Neal & kids

  7. Cindy, you are an amazing person! You will be in our daily prayers. You bless the lives of everyone you meet. We are thinking of you and we love you! Sarah Iverson & family

  8. Dearest Cindy: We received the news while on our boat. Many tears have been shed and many prayers offered. When I think of you I think of the term, "in her there is no guile". Only love and sharing and caring live within your breast. There are no answers to the question "Why Cindy?", however, I do have great faith that out of the sadness good can and will come. Lessons will be learned and growth will take place. We will pray for as much time as possible to keep you here with the least amount of pain or side effects. We all love you so very, very much.- Mary and Gary

  9. Cindy we do not like this news in your lifes journey. We are praying for new turns, with a few stop signs and extra strength for you and your family.
    Our love to you and your wonderful family,
    John and Karen

  10. I wish I were better with the words from my heart. You are in my heart and my hope is for your peace and comfort in the faith and knowledge we both know you have. You are a precious spirit and have had many trials. I know now personally about trials and I still don't understand all the reasons. I do know that God loves his children and will test where and when appropriate. I have watched you shine above all others. I have watched your example through this trial in your life and this new one seems insurmountable, but I know you have great strength, faith, courage and love from many family and friends. Please consider me one of those friends who is praying mightily. I know you are up for the task. You will end up being our strength and example when it should be the other way around. It's just who you are. You are amazing. I watched you from afar the last time and I hope you know you will be in my daily thoughts as you endure each procedure, treatment and progression. I love you with all my heart. You are a wonderful friend, but most important a beautiful wife, mother, grandmother, sister and woman (daughter of God). You have my constant prayers. Thanks to Libby for keeping us updated. She is another angel placed here for so many. Love you all down there in Farmington. Take care of each other and let me know if and when it would be appropriate to make a visit. I'd love to come for a hug from a very special woman. Maybe in a month or two.